Okay, there we all were minding our own business when someone from Corporate `R We decided the world doesn't have enough to worry about, between earthquakes, floods and everything else, and that we should all be made to feel bad about our pillows.
Tontine's latest ad claims that after a couple of years, your pillow has an entire ecosystem all of its own, feeding on your skin cells and… multiplying! I have to admit, I felt an omnipotent rush at the news, a la Lisa Simpson, I thought, My God! I've created life. I had visions of the little bits of me, happily living their own life, catching up with each other on the way to work, wearing little hats and carrying tiny lunch pails.
How they hanging, mate?
Yeah, not bad, not bad at all mate. Ecosystem's getting a bit crowded.
Maaate. There you go with that xenophobia again, mate.
I don't appreciate being called racist, mate, particularly not by a bloke wearing a dress.
I told you, mate, it's my right to freedom of expression, mate.
Since when is cross-dressing a religion, mate?